Senior caregivers often go through the ups and downs that their senior may be going through. If you are a family member caring for your senior, you may not have the formal training of some caregivers. Dealing with the stress of being a senior caregiver can seem overwhelming in these situations. In order to deal with that stress, there are a number of things senior caregivers can do to stop the stress of caregiving. After all, an unhappy caregiver will only make for an unhappy senior citizen.
• Express Your Stress, Don’t Repress it—Many senior caregivers keep their stresses inside. Repressing stress will only make things worse. Laugh. Cry. Reach out to loved ones for support. It is important to let it all out as a senior caregiver.
• Figure Out The Origins of Your Stress—There are a number of things that will make caring for your senior stressful and emotionally trying. Financial problems or a sudden change in lifestyle due to care giving can make for a more stressful disposition. By finding these stress origins, it will be easier to deal with them.
• Make Time For Yourself—Caring for a senior can consume most of hours of the day. However, it is important to make time for yourself. Do the activities you enjoy, those that help you relax and take your mind off of things. Read a book or pop in a movie to relieve the stress of caregiving.
• Wear a Smile, Not a Frown—It can be easy for a caregiver to grow negative with time when caring for a senior. All of these stresses take their toll on one’s well-being. However, senior caregivers need to wear smiles and not frowns. Being pessimistic about life will not help you or your senior.
Traditional senior living options like assisted living and nursing home facilities are institutions that provide basic care, but don’t necessarily cater improving the quality of life for our aging and their living arrangements. The Green House Model in aging care focuses upon quality of life and comfort first. The care issues are a priority but are not not the center of being like in traditional institutions.
This model gives aging seniors the comforts of home that they are familiar with along with the conveniences of having care services around them 24/7. The Green House Model is less sterile and hospital like because they provide a warm and welcoming environment to only 6-8 older seniors. Their goal is to eliminate big institutions and move towards a elder care home model that gives quality of life and improves overall well-being. As older adults move less to a nursing home or assisted living facility, the U.S. elder care facilities will adopt methods that allow independence and aging in place. The Green House Model might just be the future of elder care.
And the Eden Alternative’s principle-based philosophy empowers Care Partners to transform institutional approaches to care into the creation of a community where life is worth living. Led by our internationally-recognized founder, Dr. William Thomas, they apply 15 years of experience to guiding organizations through the journey of culture change.
Both the Eden Alternative and the Green House Model embraces a vision of eliminating loneliness, helplessness, and boredom. And they incorporate missions like improving the lives of the Elder and their Care Partners by transforming the communities where they live and work.
Traditional nursing home and assisted living facilities are large institutions that provide basic care, but don’t necessarily cater towards improving the quality of life for San Diego seniors based on their living arrangements. The Green House Model in eldercare focuses upon quality of life and comfort first, and care elements, while they are a priority, are not the center of being like they are in the large, traditional institutions.
The Green House Model tries to give seniors the comforts of home with the conveniences of having care services around them 24/7. The atmosphere is less sterile and hospital like because they try to provide a warm and welcoming environment where only 6-8 seniors are living. The goal of The Green House Model is to eliminate big institutions and move towards this model that focuses on quality of life to improve overall senior well-being. As more and more seniors are dreading moving to a nursing home or assisted living facility as they get older, the elder care structure is adopting methods that allow for senior independence and aging in place. With this in mind, The Green House Model might just be the future of elder care.
A – While to outsiders, it may seem like there’s an easy answer for those who suffer from elder abuse; don’t put up with it! But for seniors who are victims of elder abuse, scenarios are far more complex than we could ever imagine from the outside looking in.
It is true that many seniors suffer in silence, and it’s because they live in fear of the repercussions if they tell someone about the abuse their experiencing. Their fears, however, are not typically based in the concern that the abuse might get worse, but that telling someone might take the abuser out of their life forever.
Often seniors find themselves abused by the hands of their own senior caregivers, and many times, the person responsible for their care and abuse alike is a family member. Many seniors fear that by talking about the abuse, the caregiver will leave which will change the senior’s lifestyle drastically. For many seniors, the option is care at home with a family member, or moving to a nursing home or assisted living facility where they fear they’ll suffer an even worse fate by way of an ultimate loss of independence. For many seniors, it’s a better option to take the abuse and continue to suffer in silence.
(Part 2 of a 3 part series discussing the delicate issue of asking an elderly parent to retire from their driving career)
In our previous article “Talking Sex and Talking Driving” we discussed six possible reasons why emotions and perceptions may play a role in distorting a family’s evaluation of driving abilities, however unintentional that distortion may be.
Today we will briefly discuss “who” should start the conversations with a loved one about a possible retirement from what was probably a long and successful driving career.
As we know, all family make ups are different and each family structure comes with its own, unique intricacies. Therefore, no two situations are ever the same. Fortunately certain studies have uncovered some common trends which are discussed below. But first let me say that how and when the family approaches this delicate issue can make all the difference in the world as to how it is received by the elderly driver.
Spouse: Men prefer to hear the information from their spouse slightly more than women do. The nice thing about having a spouse initiate the conversation is that 1) the spouse has more than likely personally observed poor driving, and 2) a spouse has experience in working through delicate and sensitive issues with his/her loved one.
Adult Child: For many reasons, hearing such news from an adult child works best when the adult child also happens to live nearby.
Doctor: The good news is that seniors are usually open to the opinions of their doctor, the bad news is that not all doctors agree that they are the best source for making driving-related decisions. Do you know of a time when a doctor didn’t even want to get involved with an older patient about driving-related issues?
Police Officer: More than anyone, older drivers do not want to have a driving-related conversation from the police, even if it is on a friendly basis. That’s not hard for most of us to understand.
There is a whole myriad of other individuals and professionals that can be used in the conversations. In our “Driving Intervention 101” program we also discuss the role these other individuals should play.
It should also be noted that this conversation with an older driver should not be one specific “event”. Rather it should be several little conversations over time. This approach will not only make the entire process more effective, but will also help protect the dignity and self-respect of your loved one.
Again, this article is meant to serve as a very basic introduction to the issue of driving conversations. In reality, there is a whole science dedicated to the topic and we have programs that can help you better prepare for these types of talks. However, in the absence of all other resources, if you simply remember to be guided by the following statement your conversations should prove successful:
“After driving safety, helping the individual maintain his or her dignity should be the #1 concern!”
To learn more about our unique and innovative programs and how we can help YOU, please visit Keeping Us Safe at www.keepingussafe.org or call us toll-free from anywhere in the U.S. at 877-907-8841.
In this article we discussed who should be involved in family discussions related to an elderly loved-ones driving.
In part 3 of this 3 part series, we are going to look beyond the obvious at why senior drivers are often reluctant to give up their driving (even when they know it’s the right thing to do) in an article titled “But I Can’t Give Up My Driving”.
Carol’s Notes: If caregiving has been part of your life for one year or several, then your right in the middle of elder care:
Your care recipient may have deteriorated physically and mentally.
Health concerns are probably growing.
Your loved one may have been in an accident, been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease, experienced a stroke, or has congestive heart failure.
Your caregiving tasks and time have intensely increased.
The elderly loved one requires daily help with personal activities such as bathing, walking, eating, toileting, dressing, and transferring.
You thought elder care was difficult in the beginning until you got to this part, the middle. It’s the time your elderly loved one is getting more and more frail. Siblings and other relatives who helped out during the beginning stages are now worn out and have lessened their support. This is a hard place for the primary family caregiver. You start to question the level of care that you are capable of. You wonder what you should do now.
Things to remember during this middle stage
You must care for yourself – do everything to prevent caregiver burnout, illness, and injury.
Protect your elderly loved one by making a safe environment.
This period of caregiving is an extremely stressful one. Take care of yourself and don’t put too much stress on getting it right.
Adult children concerned about whether their parents have the legal documents in place so that their intentions can be known when they are gone or unable to express themselves. On the other hand, our parents may be uncomfortable discussing these matters with us, because they feel they would be giving up control, or because they want to keep these matters private.
This is a checklist that you can use to ask your parents whether they have made the necessary decisions and documented their intentions, while at the same time assuring them that you do not need to see the documents themselves:
Have you named a beneficiary on your IRA, 401(k), annuities and/or life insurance policies? Have you selected a successor beneficiary if the first beneficiary dies before you do? Does someone know where these policies are located?
Do you have a General Durable Power of Attorney that gives someone the ability to make financial decisions for you if you are not able to do so?
Do you have a Living Will and a Medical Power of Attorney that gives someone the ability to make medical decisions for you if you are not able to do so? Have you told your doctor who this person is?
Have you named a successor, if the first person named in either of those documents dies before you do, or is simply unavailable when he or she is needed?
Does the person with the Power of Attorney have a copy of the document, in case he or she needs to use it? Does he or she know where to find the original?
Is there a co-owner of any of your bank accounts, or someone with signature authority for that bank account? (NOTE: This is not necessary if a General Power of Attorney clearly gives the person with the Power of Attorney the right to access your accounts if you are not able to do so.)
Does someone else have the ability to access your Safe Deposit Box? (NOTE: This is not necessary if a General Power of Attorney clearly gives the person with the Power of Attorney the right to access your safe deposit box if you are not able to do so.) Does this person (who may have your Power of Attorney) know where the key is located, and where the box is located?
Do you have a list of all of your bank account numbers, insurance policies, your stockbroker, your lawyer and your doctors, and any other important information? Does the person with your Power of Attorney or someone else you trust know where to find it?
If you have an elderly loved one, their safety may be a major concern. It is important to plan some safety tips to be on the safe side. Even if the elderly family member is capable of caring for themselves, you can never be too cautious. There are some simple things that can be done to ensure the safety of your loved one. The following tips will help prepare for emergencies and will help to keep your senior family member safe.
• Create a communications center – this consists of important information that is needed during an emergency, such as medications, phone numbers of family members and the names of doctors. These lists should be kept near a phone or posted to the side of the refrigerator.
• Create a safety system – this could simply be a scheduled phone call to check on the individual. It could also be an installed monitoring system.
• Make sure to enforce fire prevention – do this by checking outlets, using timers and whistling tea kettles and discouraging the use of any candles.
• General household safety – install non-slip rugs, nightlights, extra lighting to increase visibility and telephones that have large buttons and light up in a dark room.
• Make sure emergency items are available, including medical cards, first-aid kits, and extra batteries, anything that would be needed in an emergency situation.
Gardening is a great pastime enjoyed by people of all ages, but it is a hobby that often older adults take on during retirement once they have more time to really nurture the items that they’ve planted and enjoy the experience. The benefits of gardening can affect the overall health in [location] seniors in the following ways:
1. Exercise – gardening is a low impact cardiovascular workout that has benefits to the heart. More strenuous gardening, like hauling rocks can equate to 600 calories and hour, but lighter activities have their benefits too! Gardening is said to work all the major muscle groups and can increase flexibility, balance and strength.
2. Nutrition – if you plant a garden with fresh fruits and vegetables, you will take pride in what you created and will be more likely to maintain a healthy well-balanced diet with your produce straight from the garden, which once planted, is also budget friendly!
3. Stress reduction – gardening helps reduce stress, even just from allowing you to be out in nature. The colors and smells are stimulating and stress relieving, and the activities can help you take your mind off of the things that are on your mind. Horticulture therapy is a common practice, and it can even help those who are sick recover faster!
Many seniors own pets. Owning a pet can have many advantages to seniors. It has been proven that pets can raise spirits and help speed up the healing process. In addition, they make wonderful companions, adding much joy and happiness to the lives of seniors. Below is a list of facts on how owning a pet can be beneficial to seniors.
1. Caring for a pet allows seniors to get exercise every day. It also helps seniors maintain daily schedules.
2. Pets are dependent on their owners. This can help seniors feel they are still needed. Pets are also loyal and faithful companions that never judge their owners. This can be very beneficial to seniors.
3. Pets can have medical benefits. Studies have indicated that seniors who own a pet often have lower blood pressure and reduced levels of stress.
4. Most senior pet owners are happy and have a lower chance of suffering from depression.
5. Studies have also shown that people who own a pet are likely to live longer. This is because of the reduced stress, increased moods and the feeling of being needed on a daily basis.
6. Pets offer a great outlet for many seniors. Most pet owners talk to their pets, telling them the events of the day or talking about something that is bothering them. While the pet offers no verbal communication, seniors with pets often feel they are being listened to, which can help them through difficult times.
Seniors who have survived cancer still face many battles. They are left with an emotional burden after they have fought their battle. Many seniors are left exhausted and may feel that they have been a burden to family members and loved ones. Cancer does not only affect those who are diagnosed. Everyone involved will go through the entire process and are all survivors. Below are some facts about being a cancer survivor.
1. When cancer is detected early and is successfully treated, patients can live for many years after they have been diagnosed. Survival times may be shorted for those who are in the low-income bracket because they typically have little or no health insurance to help with treatments.
2. As a result of cancer treatment, patients and family members face many struggles, including emotional, physical, spiritual and social. These stressors can lead to depression, so it is very important for cancer patients to have a strong support group. This is true even after the cancer has been treated.
3. It is essential to consider the chances of the cancer recurring. Being emotionally prepared will be beneficial if this should happen. Seniors who have a supportive family will benefit greatly from the strength and love of family members.
4. After treatment, senior cancer survivors need to maintain a healthy lifestyle. They should not smoke or drink and they should maintain a healthy weight. Physical activity can also reduce the chances of the cancer recurring.
